Announcing, “I just don’t like their attittudes,” Pittsburgh Pisces Owner/GM Mack Shultz announced that he had dealt the team’s ninth and fifteenth round picks in the most recent draft, starting pitchers Ramon Lopez and Jose Silva, to the New York Knights in exchange for for New York’s recent ninth and fifteenth round picks, SS Cy Tate and 2B Victor Marquez.

“When I called Lopez to tell him we had drafted him, he was just all ‘Whatever, man. That’s cool.’ That’s not what we expect from future Pisces players. Heck, our 11th round draft pick John Neal cried tears of joy when we told him that he was going to be part of our organization. Now that is Pisces Fever,” explained Shultz.

The Pisces included Jose Silva in the deal simply because his last name reminded them of Seattle Mariners high-priced porker Carlos Silva. “The Mariners still owe that guy like $25 million to eat food and throw crappy pitches the next couple years. It’s absolutely awful. I don’t know what our scouting department was thinking drafting a guy with the same last name.”

The Commissioner’s Office, when reached for comment, issued a press releasing stating, “Lent and Shultz need a hobby. Seriously. They’re pathetic.”